Back in business thanks to a government bailout.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Craptacular Friday

Michael Bay's upcoming Transformers or not cool? It looks like it could be fun. Lots of cool special effects and crap exploding....but its a movie about toys! I have kids. I don't need to pay to watch them play with Transformers. Last night I was horrified by the potential success of this movie...what if movies about toys become all the rage? Would we be subjected to Tim Burton's Candyland? Martin Scorsese's Yahtzee? I can hear the tag line now "5 mob families, 5 dice...only one wins!" Oliver Stone's Monopoly....from the creators of Saw comes "Operation the Movie!" 10 college age kids, a bag of pot and one crazy bastard yanking out their body parts....John McTiernan could do GI Joe with Bruce Willis starring....Steven Spielberg's Slinky starring Robin Wiliams.....the mind boggles....OH JEBUS...Boggle the Movie!

Burger King has the rights to the Transformers kids meal toys so I suspect I'll be sent on a few trips thru their hellish drive thru. I really think Mel Gibson missed out when he didn't ok Passion of the Christ product tie ins. How much fun would it have been for kids to reenact the last supper with action figures of Jesus and the Apostles....Judas with betraying karate chop action!

The NBA draft was last night...if ya missed it, nothing much happened. The Arena Football League playoffs start this weekend. I have zero interest but someone must. Broadcasts of the AFL regularly outdraw NHL games on TV.

Good response yesterday on the rocknroll genocide idea. I submit today for your consideration of their elimination: ZZ Top, Kiss sans makeup and post reunion, anyone associated with Yes, Phil Collins and any band that reunites without its leader under a similar name...for instance, Creedence Clearwater Revisited, ELO II (Electric Boogaloo) and the New Cars.

I finally got around to watching Lil' Bush on Comedy Central. I wouldn't say it was good...but Lil' Cheney is quite funny and I enjoy that Darth Vader is his dad.

Here now the news...

Who knew eating something called Veggie Booty would be bad for you?:

Bush to Congress..."Subpoena this beeyotch!":

The Iphone hits stores today.....its Tickle Me Elmo for tech this time tomorrow we'll be hearing about how someone was shot to death over one:,1,3320653.story?coll=chi-news-hed

TV Guide lists the 30 greatest cult shows of all time. You're a total idiot if you can't guess which geek show is number one:

As if they didn't have enough reason to cross the border....Mexico City has enacted a smoking ban...what's that? We have one in Ohio too? DIOS MIO! No ES BUENO!:,0,4368264.story?coll=la-home-center

A coroners report says comedian (and Blast Furniss fave) Richard Jeni was mentally ill when he shot himself in the head. Dr. Obvious also says black is the opposite of white, fatty foods are bad for you and you should never brush your teeth with a Chinese toothpaste:

Entertainment Weekly has 25 things that really bug them. Number One is that they've run out of things to complile lists over:,,20041669_20042482_20043806,00.html

Now go crank up some Motorhead and let Lemmy get you ready for the weekend....More crap as it happens.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Late Day Blasts

I didn't know she was even still alive...Beverly Sills said to be on death bed:

Happy to be alive...the wife of Bobby Cutts Jr, the alleged killer of North Canton's Jessie Davis, has filed for divorce (what took ya so long?):

2 things about baseball that I is agents...the other is those who think the post season, namely the World Series, should be played at a neutral, warm weather site. Meet agent Scott Boras who has done as much to harm the game as owners and steroids. He supports the neutral site idea:

Rescue Me

Rescue Me is far and way my Summertime TV fave....Denis Leary and cast put out one quality product. Sure he's lost my friends and family members than even Andy Sipowicz but Rescue Me is the very definition of must see TV. Last night's ep did not disappoint. I suspected the Chief wasn't going to go gently into that good night and for once in my life I was right. Sadly its preempted next week due to the July 4th holiday...I'm sure Fx will be running something starring Will Smith or Hugh Jackman instead.

Side note...Heard Denis Leary's song Asshole on the way into work this morning....I should add that to the list of songs to be played at my funeral.

NBA draft is tonight...who cares? I like Greg Oden but he looks older than Robert Parrish ever did. Biggest question of the draft is will the Minnesota Timberwolves deal Kevin Garnett...and if so will anyone really care? This is the first draft since the ban of selecting high school kids went into effect. The Big O doesn't think its such a good idea:
I read last week USC just recruited an 8th grader....only in America.

Why does the story of tainted Chinese toothpaste always make me crack up? Tainted toothpaste? Sounds like somthing the Joker would have come up with in the Batman comics.

Its hard to tell who is losing more frequently lately....The NY Yankess or Dubya....Breaking News...Immigration bill? DENIED!:

The almighty Bruce Campbell returns to TV today in USA's Burn Notice. Reviews are mixed but my DVR is set for it:

The Rats take the stand in the Chicago Mob Trial:,1,5154662.story?coll=chi-news-hed

I too have shed tears over Hannah Montana...everytime my daughter makes me watch it....or listen to it in the car:,0,5304197.story?coll=la-home-entertainment

Take a peek at Stephen Colbert's near comic book...thanks to Entertainment Weekly:,,20043846,00.html

Tell me what ya want what ya really really want? God, not this...

I'm working on a new Its kinda like the VH1 rock honors but instead of honoring 5 bands every year, we'll select 5 bands and have their music wiped off the face of the earth. Nominees...Journey, Chicago, 38 Special, REO, Styx, and anyone you wanna nominate.

RIP NFL Europa....NFL Europe....World League of American Football or whatever it was you called yourself this week. The NFL will officially announce tomorrow its pulling the plug on its developmental experiment tomorrow. So long Hamburg Sea Hags...we hardly know ya.

More crap as it happens....

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Wednesday Blasts

Slooooooooooooooooooooow day and there isn't much to talk about. I got my ass kicked by a batch of bad Chinese food and just wanna go back to bed. I called and complained and the manager told me they have had a lot of complaints ever since they switched to a new cat supplier.

Its been a week or so since I ran anything Sopranos related. Here's a great bit from the Onion concerning how an unhappy fan took matters into his own hands and killed James Gandolfini all in the name of "closure.":

The first reviews of the Iphone are popping up. They are much better than reviews of Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer:

Britain has a new prime minister. George Bush must be beside himself. He had the old one trained beautifully. Betcha this one ain't gonna be Dubya's lap dog:

Ok its not exactly a Lord of the Rings theme park but its a pretty darn Tolkien like place to go:

Why should atheists miss out on vacation bible school?,1,4522407.story?coll=chi-news-hed

See if you're a winner in your BET Awards office pool:

I have no desire to see Live Free or Die Hard. Love the character but Bruce Willis is now 97 years old and the movie is PG13. Yippi Ki Yay Ya Old Bastard.

Don't start your CFL fantasy league without looking at the season preview courtesty of the Boatmen:

More crap as it happens....

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Save Internet Radio

Sirius restored my faith in radio but it would be a real shame if greedy corporate pigs shut down internet radio. Don't let that the link and sign the petition!:

Spies R Us

The CIA released documents today on its sordid history....sadly, what they've revealed is nearly as big of a letdown as Geraldo's show on Al Capone's vault:

Homeless Eskimos

If you're like me you're eagerly awaiting the start of another season of Canadian Football. Sadly, 20 Edmonton Eskimos are homeless.....C'mon Edmonton open your hearts and homes!:

Am I the only person who doesn't give a rats ass about the IPhone? People are lining up outside stores in anticipation of its release. For $500 and $60 a month in service charges it better be some kinda toy:

Behind the Blog

Considering how lame the summer TV offerings are, I caught myself missing Behind the Music the other day. I don't understand why VH1 Classic doesn't at least run reruns of them. Surely it would make better viewing than another rerun of BBC Crown Jewels. Oh sure, the Thin Lizzy one is a lot of fun...the first 16 times its on....after that you want the boys to get out of town. I did a YouTube search last night for some Behind the Music eps and came up empty. That show even made Leif Garrett entertaining. Sure the stories were struggles to become famous, singer marries model or struggles with being gay, band does lots of heroin, falls on hard times, rebounds to succesful career playing fairs and festivals. I did find a website that serves as an episode guide to BtM here:
A bit of trivia that interests only me...the lowest rated BtM was the one on Badfinger.

If you were hoping Paris Hilton would rot in the joint, your hopes were dashed this morning. Sadly she's free. Mothers lock up your sons....stay off the know she'll be driving drunk again in no time.

The Afghan economy is booming...thanks to a booming opium crop!:

Here's hoping this is the start of a trend. Germany bans Tom Cruise:

Whatever happened to the Afghan Whigs? Them kids rocked.

I have zero interest in seeing the Transformers movie. Especially since it doesn't have Orson Welles in it. What did you forget he was a Transformer once?:
He was the Optimus Wine...he would not change form until its time.

I have 3 episodes of John from Cincinnati on my DVR. I doubt I'll ever watch them.

Wendys has a new burger called the Baconator...the ad tag line is "it smells fear." Its no wonder they are about to go under.

More stuff as crap develops.....

Monday, June 25, 2007

Monday's Suck

Still trying to shake off the cobwebs. 18 pots of java and still my mind is mush....

I come today to praise Poison. Not cyanide, not hemlock but the band. Saw them over the weekend with special guests Ratt and Vains of Jenna. It was a night of big hair music and big fun. Blossom Music Center was packed with fans nostalgic for their youth or their long lost full head of hair. I still have my hair and I rarely look back fondly on my youth (cuz it was just as lame as today is), but what I appreciate about Poison and bands of their ilk, is that while they were criticized as emphasizing image more than music, they honed their craft for years. They played every dive and worked hard to earn a record contract. In this American Idol age, bands who had to earn their record contracts are a dying breed. Plus their records are just flat out fun. Poison never wanted to change the world. They probably don't even know what the WTO is. They wanted nothin' but a good time and more than 20 years later they still deliver.

So the sad story of Jesse Davis ended the way most of us figured it would. The Canton mother's body was found over the weekend and her former boyfriend Canton cop Bobby Cutts Jr., who took police brutality to a new level, is charged with her murder. I don't know if the death penalty is a deterrent but if guilty Cutts certainly deserves the needle.

While I was nostaligc for the hair band 80s, aging baby boomers are remembering the summer of love: My question is I thought if you could remember the 60s you weren't really there? Summer of love...bleh....I hate hippies.

I don't know how to feel about Rupert Murdoch. On one hand he gave us Bart Simpson and Stewie Griffin...on the other he gave us Bill O'Reilly, Fox News and a bright swoosh on hockey pucks. Acting like Monty Burns, Rupe tries to add to his media empire:

The Columbus Blue Jackets introduced their new jerseys at this past weekends NHL Draft. They are ok...not great...not bad...just ok. I'm underwhelmed with them. Its good to see they are using the logo from their 3rd jersey but if you're going to be the worst team in the league you should at least look good from a fashion sense. The jersey redesign is as much a failure as the Jackets power play. Go to to check 'em out.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Friday Blasts

So this is what 300 bucks gets ya....Sting and company wanking off:

Steven Spielberg has released the first publicity pic from his upcoming movie "Indiana Jones and the Curse of Time":

Darth Cheney continues to live up to his first name:

A new study from Norway says first born children are smarter. Thats why Nikki Hilton is free and Paris is behind bars:

The greatest evils in the world today are insurance and pharmaceutical companies. Michael Moore's new film Sicko takes on the broken health care system in the U.S. It opens in limited release today and the first reviews are great :

The Columbus Blue Jackets host this weekends NHL Draft which starts today at Nationwide Arena. Prior to the draft announcements of players 99.9 percent of Americans have never heard of, the CBJ will unveil their new jersey. Anything will be an improvement over the lime green bug they used to wear. Considering how badly the Jackets suck they might as well at least look good if they can't play worth a lick.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Thursday Evening Blasts

Bob Evans...the sausage king has bought the farm. Dead at age 89. Thanks for the grub and rest in peace. says Drew Carey is in the running to replace Bob Barker as host of the Price is Right. Boy his career sure is going places these days eh? What was Michael Richards busy?

A new Newsweek poll shows George W. Bush with the lowest approval rating for a sitting president since Nixon. Just 26 percent approve of his job performance. Full story here: is running a nice debate on the worst career moves of all time. Debate all ya want but nothing tops Shelly Long leaving Cheers:

Ya know who has a good racket going? Ticketmaster. A $15 lawn seat for this weekends hair metal bill at Blossom Music Center with Ratt and Poison sounds like a good value. Until they add in their $7.15 "convenience" fee and a $6 Building facilty charge.

Entertainment Weekly ranks the 25 worst movie sequels of all time. Me thinksa Jar Jar Binks is a on da lista:,,20041669_20041686_1169126,00.html

Thursday Tidbits

It wasn't that long ago that tv stations had local programming that was worth watching. As a kid I had Fritz the Nite Owl in Columbus and Superhost and Big Chuck on Cleveland TV. Fritz the Nite Owl and Superhost left the airwaves a long time ago and now Big Chuck hangs it up too. The Cleveland Plain Dealer has a nice article today:

Here's a related article on the folks that helped Big Chuck stay on the air for so long:

The Old Man of Metal has made his presence known and tipped me off to a story in todays Columbus Dispatch on the best rock n' roll band in the world, American Dog. Read this article and then make plans to go see them IMMEDIATELY.

File this under things that make you go puke.....So disturbing it has to be true. is reporting that Liza Loves Chachi...Yep, Scott Baio once got it on with Liza. For putting that disturbing visual in my head both should be blindfolded and put in front of a firing squad.

Bloomberg for President...he actually doesn't sound as bad as most of the other candidates. If he supports American Dog I'm behind him:

With the war in Iraq continuing be a lost cause, Bush turns to his war on science:

UC Riverside has more geeks in its library than any other university in the country:,0,6121281.story?coll=la-home-center

Law&Order SUV behind a crime?,1,482784.story?coll=chi-news-hed

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Wednesday Afternoon Crapfest

Not much going on in the world but here's some stuff to keep you from being productive at work:

MSNBC has a story on why humans shouldn't have litters of offspring:

Where does Tom Cruise end and John Travolta begin? Both have succesful movie careers, actress wives, and have fought off media rumors that they are gay (not that there's anything wrong with that). Oh and they are both Scientologists and hate psychiatrists:

Ain't it Cool News is running the first fan review of the movie reimagining no one wanted, Rob Zombie's Halloween :

2 years after Hurricane Katrina and the Bush Administration is still trying to drown New Orleans like an overstressed Texas housewife:
Heckuva job Brownie!

Imagine the sound the game made when Pac Man got gobbled up by the ghosts in the old arcade it in your head? Its game over for Pac Man Jones:

Crowded House Returns

While I'm excited by the return of Crowded House, one of the finest pop bands of our time, my excitment is lessened by their lack of an Ohio tour stop. I do eagerly anticipate the release of their first studio record in 13 years on July 2nd. Time on Earth is a fantastic piece of music that will probably not be heard by enough or sell as much as it deserves. British newspaper Music Week profiles the Crowdies in the new issue but you can read it here:

Gee, I've mentioned Flight of the Concords and Crowded House. All I need to complete the New Zealand trifecta is find something to post on Peter Jackson.

Feeling Drafty

Considering the ratings of the NHL Stanley Cup Finals were so bad its safe to say the public at large has absolutely no interest in the NHL. In fact, the NBC affiliate in Tampa, where the Lighting won the Cup 3 years ago, pre-empted the games to show something else. Bad news for the NHL but probably a smart move for the station as test patterns would have drawn a better rating. NBC's coverage of the Cup was laughable anyway. When you cut away from an overtime game for pre-race coverage of the Preakness, it tells you all you need to know about the state of the NHL.

Its with these rays of sunshine the NHL blooms in Columbus this weekend for the annual player draft, or as my friend TFO calls it, "the day where the Blue Jackets select their next colossal bust or candidate for the injury list." Now I should note that TFO is the biggest hockey fan I know. In fact, he's the only hockey fan I know (other than myself). He actually has another friend who is a hockey fan...well technically, he's an Anaheim Ducks fan. If you're a fan of the Ducks, I don't really consider you a fan of hockey. A fan of water fowl most certainly but no hockey fan could ever root for a team that was designed as a marketing ploy by the evil empire Disney. TFO's request for his beloved Blue Jackets this weekend is a simple one...its to draft a player who doesn't suck. No more Nik Zherdevs....No more walking wounded like Alexander Picard, Derek Brassard, and Pascal LeClaire. The Jackets pick 7th and the pundits have them taking blueliner Karl Alzner.

Whoever the Jackets pick, 5 minutes after his name is called we'll find out he shared a flight with that TB guy and has been involved in a relationship with Lindsay Lohan and he'll spend the year on the injured list with a rare strains of TB and STD's.

The highlight of the Draft weekend should be the unveiling of the new Jackets jerseys. The league has been promoting the new space age materials in the jersey and how they will improve both comfort and performance. For the lowly Jackets they better hope the jersey is like Spiderman's black suit and contains the dna of Rocket Richard.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Flight of the Concords

So I finally got around to watching the first episode of the new HBO show Flight of the Concords. I have to say it was better than I thought it would be and I'm looking forward to seeing more of it. If you missed it here's a link to a clip of their recent appearance on Late Show with David Letterman. The song is "Beautiful Girl" and it cracks me up.

Reviews of the show haven't been too bad. From the NY Times (by way of AICN) "funny in such an understated way that it is almost dangerous to make too much of it — it could collapse like a soufflĂ© when the door slams. It’s much slighter than HBO’s big production comedies like “Curb Your Enthusiasm” and “Entourage.” It’s also a little sweeter, less a satire of show business than wry self-parody.… "

It airs Sunday nights at 1030 on HBO...check out repeat broadcasts during the week.

Tuesday Afternoon Update

Rolling Stone asks is Nirvana overrated? D'uh!

Wikipedia too liberal for ya? The right wing has your junk knowledge resource counterpoint...all hail Conservapedia!,0,5282071.story?track=mostviewed-storylevel

My friend Pedro sung Hell's Kitchen's god that boy was right. I still hate reality tv but the entertainment factor can't be denied. Here's a nice write up from Entertainment Weekly on H.K.'s star Gordon Ramsay:,,20040769_20040772_20042617,00.html

Another promising young life snuffed out in Iraq:

How many more Mr. Bush? Sadly, the answer is going to be a lot more:

With no new Sopranos news or theories today, I had to find something on the "real" mob. Here's a story on a mob trial in Chicago that will be heard by an "anonymous" jury:,1,1911011.story?coll=chi-news-hed&ctrack=1&cset=true

Late Night Wars 2

Looks like NBC is trying to back out of giving Conan the tonight show.....Check out this story from Broadcasting and Cable:

"After NBC Universal’s high-profile signing of Ben Silverman for the top programming job, Comedy Central’s Jon Stewart might be next on the Peacock’s wish list.NBC Universal President/Chief Executive Jeff Zucker and NBC Entertainment/Universal Media Studios Co-Chair Marc Graboff recently wined and dined the satirical news anchor and his agent, James Dixon.According to a network source, Zucker and Graboff didn’t focus on pitching any specific role at the dinner meeting. “They just made their interest known in finding a way to do business together if Jon was ever available,” says the source, who categorized the talks as “exploratory.”"

Personally, I don't see Stewart wanting to follow Leno at all. If Conan gets screwed over, he'll land on his feet at another network. Full story here:

Who says Reality Shows are bad career moves? Well, everyone....Motley Crue says Tommy Lee's reality show appearances damged their career. Ya know what did more damage to them than Rockstar Supernova did? The calendar. When the 80's were over, for all intents and purposes, they were too. Full story

Parents, take those toys away from your kids before they get killed. The NY Times reports that toys made in China are toxic. Mmmm lead based paint....full story here:

Monday, June 18, 2007

Monday Mania

Ok, I thought I'd figured out the end of the Bob Harris has me thinking maybe Tony is dead. All I know for sure now is that everytime I think of the ending it makes my head hurt. Thanks to Pedro for the link:

Watch your, really, someone may be trying to steal it:

The Adult Film Industry went with HD-DVD, Blockbuster banks on Blu-Ray...its beta versus VHS again:

Entertainment Weekly has released its list of the top 25 Action Movies of all time. Read, discuss, argue:,,20042607,00.html

What's a pig in the mood supposed to do to get a little love?:

Saturday, June 16, 2007

The Return of PT Anderson

One of my favorite directors of recent times, Paul Thomas Anderson, is back with the trailer for his upcoming film There Will Be Blood. Click this link to cigaretts and redvines to check it out.

Friday, June 15, 2007

The Cucumber Pepsi Generation

Cucumber Pepsi? McDonald's Salmon Wraps? Crazy foreigners!

Its ok to stop believin', really it is

Journey fans were thrilled that Don't Stop Believin' was used in the last scene of the Sopranos finale. Well, I mean they should be thrilled considering how you never hear Journey songs on classic rock radio (yes, that was sarcasm). In case you didn't know, lead singer Steve Perry was kicked to the curb about a decade ago. He was replaced by a guy who looked like the love child of Steve Perry and Kenny G and sounded just like Steve Perry (which would probably be the sole criteria for being the singer of a band that hasn't had a hit since Reagan was in office). So Steve Perry Jr. got sacked a year ago after word leaked on the net that the band may have been faking their vocals in concert. Perry Jr.'s replacement is a rock veteran named Jeff Scott Soto (who sounds nothing like Steve Perry nor looks like him...which is good for him) who saves the band's last tour....only to be kicked out only hours after the Sopranos faded to black. The reason for the dismissal? Jeff Scott Soto doesn't look or sound like Steve Perry (guess they didn't notice this before they hired him. Journey fans are ticked off and one of them has set up his own blog about it. Even if you find Journey guilty of committing hate crimes against people with taste (and I do), you'll find the blog entertaining.

EW's Sopranos Theory

Entertainment Weekly has posted one of the best pieces on the Sopranos finale yet,,20040769_20040772_20042736,00.html

Even Tony Soprano is stumped

James Gandolfini says he doesn't even know what the ending of the Sopranos means...but he likes it.

Tonys and Tigers

Its been a big week for Tonys and Tigers....The Tony Awards (YAWN) were last Sunday night (if you aren't gay or living in NYC you probably missed them too), the last episode of the (Tony) Sopranos ran, Kellogg's the people that bring you Frosted Flakes, Fruit Loops and Pop Tarts, announced that they would no longer be using their cartoon pitchman in ads aimed at kids. Guess its snap, crackle and piss off for the Rice Krispy dwarfs. Last night Tony Parker of the San Antonio Spurs was named MVP of the NBA Finals. It was a big week too for Detroit Tiger Justin Verlander who threw a no hitter at the Brewers.

One last reference to Tony's and Tigers before I crap myself in disbelief....many folks have posted on the net that the end of the Sopranos is similar to the short story the Lady and the Tiger. I hadn't read it in ages. Read it and see what ya think. Thanks to Jami for sharing.

Cream O'Wheat

I've never had a bowl of cream of wheat in my life. My Dad used to eat the stuff and for some reason, I found it repulsive compared to my standard childhood breakfast Count Chocula. Even if like me you never considered making Cream of Wheat part of your breakfast table, you're probably familiar with the man on its box. Much to my surprise, he was a real named Frank White. Mr. White died in 1398 and for years there was no marker on his grave. The folks in Leslie, MI have changed that. Count Chocula meanwhile remains among the undead, ruining the diets of children and keeping dentists in business. Click this link for the full story on Mr. White :

4 lesbians in New York are looking at prison after attacking a straight man in what has been called a "hate crime against straight people." I thought the same thing about the WNBA but they are still taking up precious air time on ESPN.

A Lebanese news anchor was fired after gloating over the assassination of an anti Syrian member of parliament. "Why did it take them so long to kill him?" the anchor asked on air. I wasn't aware Fox News was broadcasting in Lebanon.

Stephen Hawking is putting out a children's book about a character named George who befriends a scientist and finds himself on a physics driven adventure. Can't suck any worse than Madonna's books for children. Sounds more entertaining than Fantastic Four 2. Heck, President Bush called it the best book he's read since My Pet Goat.

Not even the birth of his 2nd son Bryce Maximus James could help LeBron and and the Cavs last night as they were swept by the San Antonio Spurs in the NBA Finals. For all you basketball lovers, basketball hasn't ended. Go watch the WNBA. Just don't come running to me when you become the victim of a hate crime.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Blog Sweet Blog

The other day over coffee at Starbucks I leaned over and told my best friend Gerard, "Ya know Gerard, What the world needs now is another blog." Gerard was speechless. He just gazed at me silently the way he always does when he's in total agreement with me. I must have asked him six times "What do ya think man? What do you think?" But he never said a word.That's when it hit me....Gerard is mute. So if this blog sucks ass, blame Gerard. He had the chance to speak up....and he chose not to.

Seriously, no one wants this blog. I could try to tell you that this is going to be the greatest blog since the Daily Koz, the Huffington Post or Dina Lohan's blog on how hard it is to breast feed your spoiled 21 year old alcoholic celebrity daughter. But I'm not going to do it. I'm going to assume something that the network news refuses to acknowledge....that you dear readers are smart human beings. You'll see right thru my BS the same way the clear majority of Americans saw thru the pre-Iraq war lies of the Bush administration.....ok, bad example.

Like me you don't give a shit about Larry Birkhead's blue ribbon winning sperm. You agree with me that the world is a safer place with Paris Hilton behind bars. Fewer of you are wondering along with me....Is Paris having girl on girl prison love? Is Sybil Danning her guard? Does the thought of why Paris is in prison when Dick Cheney shoots a man in the face and still freely walks the streets of an undisclosed location go thru your head at night? Could Dick shoot Paris in the face...hmmm...wait I've seen her video...that's already happened.

If these things interest you, this might just be the place for ya. I'll talk about the usual blog stuff: politics, celebrities, the news of the day. Now to make my blog stand out from all the others, I would actually pay you to read it every day....if I weren't so damn broke. Now run along....these pants are driving me crazy and I get crap on the TiVo to watch.