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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Turd Sandwich of the Year


Selecting the BlastFurniss Turd Sandwich of the Year required a lot of thought and caused me much stomach upset. I kept going back and forth from a number of different candidates. There were so many pieces of shite to choose from but I finally came to a decision.....
But first lets discuss who it isn't: Its not Dubya...as much as he deserves it for waging this war without end. Trillions of dollars and thousands of lives wasted and for what? NOTHING. Sure he's deserving but as much as it pains me to say, the idiots of Congress and the American people allowed this travesty to occur.
I gave serious attention to bestowing the honor to the news media. This year we've been subjected to all sorts of coverage on Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, the feuds at the View...not to mention the usual fare like missing wives, what we eat might be bad for us, etc, etc, etc. ....while spending precious little air time on important issues like the war, poverty, the plight of Africa...but the news media does this because the American people want them to.
The Turd Sandwich of the Year then should go the American people then...but it isn't.
No the Turd Sandwich of the Year goes to Michael Vick. Lets face it, of all the stupid pieces of shite this year he was the biggest poo in the potty. The mess Vick made of his life must have weighed at least 300 Courics (if you don't watch South Park you didn't get that......A Couric is a system of weights and measures used to measure poo....300 Courics would mean its equal to 300 Katie Courics). Quite simply Michael Vick had the American Dream and he pissed it all away thru his own arrogance and greed. C'mon...dogfighting? Really? This is what gets you off? Worse than it being a vile act, to finance and participate in such an operation when you are a starting quarterback in the NFL with one of the richest contracts in all of sport (and an endorsement deal to match) is just the height of ignorance. For these acts of stupidity, Michael Vick is the BlastFurniss Turd Sandwich Winner of the Year.

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