Classic Talk Show Moments

Hard to believe that someone once wound up on Donahue because he pretended to be Kiss drummer Peter Criss?

The disturbing teeth of Richard Branson

Is it just me or does billionaire Richard Branson have the worst false teeth ever? How can someone so wealthy have such awful fake teeth?

Are You Ready For Some Football?

Last Thursday night I had nothing going on. Tonight I have decisions to make. Do I go to the White Trash Mardi Gras known as the Popcorn Festival or do I stay home and watch the NFL season kick off with the Colts and the Saints? I think I may try to do both. Make a run for food, dodging thru the scumbags who've taken over my city streets and then head home. That means passing up the Ac/Dc tribute band playing tonight. I think it should be mandatory that any singer in an Ac/Dc tribute band must choke to death on vomit during the show. I don't care who the vomit belongs to.

Are you playing fantasy football? My Marion Misfits are back for another season. The autodraft was unkind to me. I wound up with ASPCA Man of the Year Mike Vick on my roster. I cut him but my team still blows. Plus I have Jesus in my league. Guy wins every year. Always knows exactly who to play. I think he has an inside source telling him who to start.

You can put an end to the Pavarotti death watch...the 71 year old tubby tenor died over night from pancreatic cancer. With his passing that beat box prick from last season's American Idol now takes the title of the world's greatest living singer:http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/06/arts/music/06pavarotti.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin

Proof that Fred Thompson would make a lousy president....he was a lousy senator, he was dull on Law & Order and he chose Leno to announce his candidacy...no one chooses Leno...its like chosing Dan Quayle...Thompson cannot be trusted to have his finger on the button if he actually likes Leno:http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/09/05/AR2007090502602.html?hpid=topnews

I do not fear terrorists...I fear our own stupidity...for instance, my fave story of the week. 5 nuclear warheads and their unauthorized coast to coast flight:http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/chi-bomber_thurssep06,1,6510396.story?coll=chi_breaking_500

Pardon me if I don't give a damn about Steve Fosset going missing. I have no pity for a rich guy who regularly puts his life at risk in order to get his rocks off. I wish more rich white guys would disappear in the mountains.

10 grand in porn? Seriously...guess if I had 10 large tied up in porn I'd want it back too:http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2007/09/05/legal.roundup.porn.CNN

I guess it was hard work making 3:10 to Yuma. Wah...making movies is hard work...wah:http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/movies/la-wk-movies6sep06,0,5899775.story?coll=la-home-entertainment

Is it really necessary to have a benefit concert on Mt. Everest? Someplaces should be safe from marketing gimics. I hope they have an avalanche:http://www.lovehopestrength.org/main.php

The season finale of Rescue Me is next week. Can't wait to wrap up this disappointing season:http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20040769_20040772_20054918,00.html

Don't look for sequester house shots on Big Bro this season:http://www.tvsquad.com/2007/09/05/cbs-declining-to-show-big-brother-8-sequester-house/

Yet another Flava of Love/Rock of Love show coming to VH1:http://www.roadrunnerrecords.com/blabbermouth.net/news.aspx?mode=Article&newsitemID=80200

Eddie Griffin's standup act was halted because he used the "n" word. If he's like most black comedians he wouldn't have any material without the "n" word. Here's an n word for you to describe Eddie Griffin "no talent" sure I know that's two words but it sums him up:http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/09/05/AR2007090501860.html

Devo is back:http://www.adweek.com/aw/creative/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1003617437#

Maybe there is a God...no one seems to give a shite about American Idol anymore:http://www.usatoday.com/life/music/news/2007-09-04-idol-tour_N.htm

Ya heard it here first...the New Orleans Saints will meet the New England Patriots in the Super Bowl. Dallas is my pick for most overrated team. They are getting picked to go to the Super Bowl but I don't see why. They start two receivers over the age of 30 and no team with receivers that old has ever gone on to the Super Bowl.

Look for last year's Super Bowl teams, the Bears and Colts, to come crashing back down to earth. Indy's defense blows and Bears QB Rex Grossman sucks like a gay porn star.

Other dazzling observations by me: The AFC will be far superior to the NFC My Browns will win 3 games at most. The Bengals will be a .500 club. Pittsburgh will rebound this year and lose to the Pats in the AFC Championship game. San Diego will regret firing Marty Schottenheimer as Norv Turner is the worst 3 time NFL head coach in history. The NFL will have at least one more Mike Vick type scandal on its hands. The league is populated by thugs and its gonna take Roger Goodell a long time to rid the league of the hood element.

More crap as it happens....

Bill Hicks - Non-Smokers

4 days without smoking. Today has been the worst. I woke up at 4am and have been cranky all day. I think my head my cave in at any moment. I find myself hating everything and everyone I come in contact with. Thats not really a bad thing except I work with the public. While I'm missing my smokes, I figure I'm up about 20 bucks. That's a plus.

The Gift of Gab

Watching Bill Clinton on Letterman last night I realized how much I took the man for granted. For instance, his ability to speak correctly.....and not wage senseless war. The former prez was in fine form as he is out making the talk show rounds promoting his new book.

Note to Keith Olbermann...Keith....I love the show. Looking forward to seeing you with Costas on Sunday Night Football but the Special Comment thing? Can you ease up a bit? Don't get me wrong I agree with you. Bush is an idiot and he completely lacks credibility on the war but we don't a special comment every night on it. Save them for well, something special. Thanks Keith. Say hi to Dan Patrick.

Can we put an end to this toy recall nonsense already? Just yank every toy out of every kids hand and send it back to China already. Mattel is recalling even more toys:http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20592481/

If the Mexicans can't come to you, go to where the Mexicans are:http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/05/us/05export.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin

The Phil Spector trial is winding down and he do do do did it:http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/09/05/AR2007090500422.html

Someone must still be pissed about the last episode of the Sopranos:http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime_file/2007/09/05/2007-09-05_soprano_michael_imperioli_baffled_by_bom-2.html

I guess one of the requirements to be a regular host on the View is to be an idiot:http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=domesticNews&storyid=2007-09-05T012922Z_01_N04445007_RTRUKOC_0_US-NFL-VICK-WHOOPI.xml

Ya know the real tragedy in this whole Anna Nicole Smith thing? Is that everyone involved didn't die. Now the two men who claimed to be the father of her bastard kid may be gay lovers:http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8REVKJG0&show_article=1

Why won't Tommy Lee die too?:http://www.nypost.com/seven/09052007/gossip/pagesix/sex_in_public.htm

Kevin Costner? Didn't he win an Oscar?:http://ifiblogit.blogspot.com/

Jerry Lewis is sorry and wants you to know he loves gay people:http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2007-09-04-lewis_N.htm

Rob Zombie says no mas to Michael Myers:http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20054657,00.html

Going to see Van Halen? Wear one of these:http://www.cafepress.com/whereismikey

The Bridge School Benefit looks pretty good...if Metallica weren't on the bill:http://www.bridgeschool.org/events.html

Meet an athlete more evil than Mike Vick:http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,295695,00.html

The Tribe opens up a 7 game lead in the AL Central:http://www.thediatribe.com/

T.O. is still an azz:http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1657808,00.html

This is kinda cool. The Cleveland Plain Dealer has a new database that gives you the write up of every Browns game EVER..:http://www.cleveland.com/brownshistory/

Tickets go on sale this weekend for your Columbus Blue Jackets. If you guess the date the team is eliminated from the playoffs you can win a lifetime luxury box.

More crap as it happens...........

Radio Nowhere Video Debut

Amazon.com is running the new Springsteen video for the next 24 hours. Click the link to see Radio Nowhere:http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/browse/-/5174

Great Moments in Sports-Appalachian State vs Michigan 2007 - Blocked Field Goal

What a classic moment...a great upset....the beginning of the end of Lloyd Carr...damn funny too.