Back in business thanks to a government bailout.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Fun Facts

I know I said that I'd keep the blog alive thru the end of the month but I've decided to wrap it all up tomorrow.....Before I close up shop here and team up with the O.M.O.M. for the relaunch of the all new From Out of Nowhere (that', I thought I'd post some fun facts about me, life, the universe and everything...

While technically the first concert I ever saw was Sha Na Na at the Ohio State Fair, the first concert I claim was Ted Nugent on the Penetrator tour. Brian Howe, who would later go on to suck in Bad Company was the lead vocalist on that tour. Should you ever meet American Dog guitar player SteveTheado, please break out into a chorus of "Don't you want my love....." Don't hold me liable if he smacks you with his guitar. Good show...Yngwie Malmsteen and Alcatraz opened. Awful, awful band.

The first election I ever voted in was the 1988 primary. I cast my vote for Jesse Jackson. I knew even then that my vote didn't really matter.

Up until 1995 I owned every Dokken, Rainbow, Black n' Blue I own none of them.

I thought Hootie and the Blowfish would be tearing up the charts for years (no, seriously I did) with their late 20th century blend of frat rock.

There are over 300,000 fast food places across America but only one has a clean bathroom (here's a hint..its in Utah).

McDonalds distributes more toys each year than Toys R Us or Walmart combined.

I've never had cancer.

Thousands of people in the Australian census declare their religion as "Jedi."

On a jury duty form I once listed my job title as "Supervisor of Collections of souls."

Reality dating shows have been blamed for a rise in cases of "skankophobia."

The treaty that ended World War II required that all German heavy metal bands include at least 3 homosexuals.

Cellphone use is the leading cause of erectile dysfunction and male pattern baldness.

I once joined the legendary Dublin, Ireland band An Emotional Fish on stage for a blistering version of Lou Reed's Rock n' Roll....true story.

The Godz really were indeed rock n' roll machines. They were created by Issac Asimov to promote his latest short story on robots.

Dogs really can't lick their own junk.....they are actually master illusionists and they do it to freak out jealous humans.

Will Rogers once said "I never met a cat I didn't want to use for target practice."

The Secret Service's code name for Dick Cheney is "Johnny Wadd."

Pandas are discriminated against in the wild because other bears consider them to be "biracial" because of their black and white color.

The Popsicle was invented by Thomas Edison after he accidentally caught his penis in the freezer.

Now do you see why I'm shutting the blog down? Its hard to come up with nonsense like this on a daily basis....enjoy the sweltering heat.

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