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Monday, March 3, 2008

Beware the S'March of Metal



The S'March of Metal is upon us...Motorhead and Iron Maiden vids already posted. Make sure to play them loud...together we can melt the sun!
Up also is a clip from one of the final (for now anyway) Van Halen shows. In it, you can see Eddie Van Halen totally mangle his solo in Jump, then bash his guitar, and finally, knock over a stack of amps and almost hit David Lee Roth in the process. As I noted in the video, Van Halen has cancelled all remaining tour dates for 2008, meaning if you have tix for the Columbus show on April 1, well, April Fool!
No one from the VH camp has said anything but the intergoogles are abuzz with everything from Ed is drinking again to Ed's having "health" issues. Now, I know Eddie probably doesn't spend anytime online but Ed, if you're reading this...take a good look at that picture of you...the one where you look like the offspring of Grandpa Al Lewis and the Crypt Keeper...now you're looking better than that these days but you know, it wouldn't take much to get you back to that point again. Whatever the issues are, Val's book and need to cleanse her soul on every talk show, drinking, cancer, bad hearing Wolfie being chunky, Dave acting more and more gay...whatever the issue is Ed, deal with it and keep your health in order.
Depsite him being an asshole and a drunk, I really like Eddie Van Halen. Those early records are part of the soundtrack of my life. But who didn't see this tour falling apart (other than Jeff Healey maybe...more on him in a sec)? Eddie is a train wreck and maybe he should have spent more time as a sober person before going back out on the road. At this point Ed can do two things..he can either get his shit together, or he can drink himself to death and choke on vomit (I don't care who provides the vomit).
Now as for Jeff Healey....the dude best known for the hit "Angel Eyes" died from cancer over the weekend. Healey, if ya don't remember, was the blind cat who played guitar on his lap. I wasn't a fan but I admired the fact that he learned to play guitar despite his blindness. Stevie Wonder never even learned to play guitar and he plays everything else.
Thank god the Ohio primary is over tomorrow. I'm afraid tho I'll being going thru campaign ad withdraw come Wednesday. I'm sick of the national media visiting Ohio and fawning over us. If I hear one more reporter says "Ohio is a true reflection of America" I'll puke (thus killing Eddie Van Halen in the process). Every state is a reflection of America. Well, except for Alabama....and Mississippi....and West Virginia.
Ain't talkin' bout love.....












8 comments:

O.M.O.M. said...

Eddie needs to get his shit together. I'm shocked that the tour lasted as long as it did. Now that I don't have to worry about scalping tix to VH, I guess that is more cash I can save to scalp Police tix for the wife.

Sorry to hear of Healey's passing, he'd been doing the jazz thing as of late and did a weekly residency at a club he owned in Canada. I had heard about his cancer but at that time it was in remission.

TFO said...

I'm not really surprised either that the tour is cancelled - I don't think there is a stage or arena anywhere on the planet big enough to house those egos...

E. S. Furniss said...

EVH is even more pathetic than Britney Spears. He's a grown man...he should know better. I think the dude has some serious issue...definitely substance abuse problems and I guarantee ya, mental ones too. With parents like Ed and Val, I'm surprised Wolfie hasn't climbed up on a water tower and started picking people off.

If memory serves, wasn't Healey in the movie Road House? I must confess, I never really listened to the dude past his first two records. Admire his playing tho...pretty darn cool how he learned to shred despite being blind.

Tempted to go see Robert Cray this week in Newark but I suspect I'm gonna pass.

TFO said...

That pic of Eddie cracks me up - looks like he's screaming at people to help him find his teeth...

Yes, Jeff Healey was in Road House - I'm embarrassed to say that 'cause now everyone knows that I actually watched that piece o' crap movie...I never knew he had cancer though, too bad.

O.M.O.M. said...

Not metal related, but I'm really jazzed about the new Crowes album that hits tomorrow. They have done one heck of a job keeping a lid on this release. Saturday night I poked around the net looking for a leaked copy and couldn't find one. Kudos to them for keeping this from going all over the web.

E. S. Furniss said...

TFO, I hope you only saw Road House cuz you were on a date with a really hot chick that swooned for Swayze. If you own it on DVD I will mock you for the rest of your life. I haven't seen a Swayze flick since Red Dawn.

OMOM, I too am jonesed bout the Crowes record. I tried downloading it on SoulSeek but had no luck. Just as well. I think this may be one of the few records I buy the day its released...provided I can find it here in town. I love Goodbye Daughters of the Revolution. Chris is in good voice and some nice slide work from Rich. Rolling Stone offered much praise for it....for what their opinion is worth. I'm hoping unlike Maxim they at least listened to the record. I guess only two songs are about Kate Hudson so that makes me happy.

I loathe Owen Wilson since learning he tried to off himself cuz of her.

TFO said...

I do not own it on DVD - sorry. One of those boring afternoons when it came on cable tv. I guess you'll have to find something else to mock me over for the rest of my life. Not to worry, I'm always coming up with new material and already have a plethora of shit for which I can be made fun of....

E. S. Furniss said...

You're a good sport TFO...I think you'd be hard pressed to find a star who has fallen further than Swayze. What has that dude done since Point Break? At least Jean Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren are still making direct to dvd flicks.