Rocklahoma and Other Wastes of Time

It's Rocklahoma Day One! C'mon feel the noize! I SAID FEEL IT!....that's better. Still nothing on the show in the Pryor, OK paper but I did find an article from the Tulsa World. Seems cowboys like their hair metal more than they like country:http://www.tulsaworld.com/entertainment/article.aspx?articleID=070707_8_H3_NoArt00052

Todays lineup was added at the last minute and doesn't feature anyone of note. Mainly tribute bands....sigh.....Tomorrow is Poison, Ratt, White Lion (or Mike Tramp's White Lion...don't wanna get sued by Vito Bratta), Y&T and (GROAN) Slaughter. Complete weekend lineup here:http://www.rockfeverfest.com/artists.php

I wish the people of Pryor the best of luck. Now Oklahoma is home to more than steers and queers (thanks Officer and a Gentleman)...its now home to washed up hair bands and their aging, balding fanbase. One of the organizers predicts crowds of 40-50,000 a day...that sounds like a more realistic number for the whole weekend. I can't help but think a place like Michigan where Poison regularly sells out sheds would have been a more ideal location for an event like this.

She's young, she's hot...she likes girls? Oh Lindsay Lohan won't you just fall off the face of the earth...or make a video I can see on the net:http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/bwiddicombe/2007/07/11/2007-07-11_lilos_myspace_gets_invaded.html

Oh Kramer.....so full of wacky stunts. Try not to slur the natives while you find yourself:http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/celebrity/la-et-richards13jul13,1,6192959.story?coll=la-headlines-entnews&ctrack=4&cset=true

The Firefighers union is going after cross dressin' Rudy...burn baby burn!:http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/07/11/firefighters-take-on-giuliani/

The only reunited act not at Rocklahoma is al Qaeda now back on the road and stronger than ever...Heckuva job there Dubya, heckuva job:http://breakingnews.nypost.com/dynamic/stories/U/US_TERROR_THREAT?SITE=NYNYP&SECTION=HOME

Yes we're losing the war on terror and the war in Iraq....Bush wages war like that team that plays the Globetrotters:http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19723307/

Ipods+lightning=death:http://www.chicagotribune.com/business/chi-ipods_12jul12,1,815141.story?coll=chi-news-hed

Jim Morrison is still dead.....yet the circumstances surrounding his death from heroin and bad poetry are being reexamined:http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/index.php/2007/07/10/jim-morrisons-death-may-be-reinvestigated/

Hardly known rocker Glen Burtnick has put a band together that'll play all of Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band in honor of the 40th anniversary of the Beatles masterpiece. Dear Lord make them stop....1st it was the Fab Faux which features David Letterman show bassist Will Lee..then it was the Smithereens releasing a record where they play all of Meet the Beatles...Bands with record contracts or tv gigs should not be allowed to become cover bands.

More crap as it happens.....

All Star Game Hangover Wednesday

Stupid baseball All Star game keeping me up late! Good game, actually quickly played for a change. Nice tribute to Willie Mays beforehand. The 3 Indians players played well as did the Reds lone rep Ken Griffey Jr. AL continues its dominance winning 5-4.

Its Rocklahoma Eve! Is Pryor, OK ready to rock? I said Pryor are you ready to rock? What's that? A goat conference? Well maybe they'll be ready to rock after the goat conference:http://www.pryordailytimes.com/agriculture/cnhinsagriculture_story_163104149.html?keyword=topstory

By the way, I haven't found one mention of Rocklahoma in the Pryor Daily Times this week. How will the residents of Pryor learn that Donnie Vie won't be appearing with Enuff Z'Nuff if the Pryor Daily Times doesn't tell them?

Yesterday I made mention how someone on the Melodicrock.com noticeboard made reference to the blog over there. Turns out someone saw the Def Leppard review in the Dispatch and gave me credit for writing it which led to some bashing of me by Def Lep fans. I would just like to thank Scott from London for taking the time to slam me for something I didn't write. Its nice knowing that even without doing anything I can piss off someone in another country.

Yesterday I had some fun with Gene Simmons. Today lets take a crack at Paul Stanley. The former Star Child, the man who put the X in sex, has followed in the footsteps of David Bowie, John Mellencamp and Adolf Hitler and exhibited his artwork. My question is this: When did Paul become Liza? Awful plastic surgery:http://paulstanley.com/

Somehow I don't see the Simpsons as being New Englanders. But Vermont wins the USA Today Springfield contest and gets to host the premiere of the Simpsons movie:http://www.usatoday.com/life/movies/news/2007-07-10-simpsons-vermont-inside_N.htm
Did ya catch the Simpsons bit at the opening of the All Star game? Homer made reference to the athletic bodies of David Ortiz, Prince Fielder and CC Sabathia all drawn in splendid Simpsons form. They were fatter than Homer.

AICN is reporting that the people who dropped High School Musical are remaking Footloose. Please someone detain Kenny Loggins as an enemy combatant now!

Please detain Ryan Seacrest as well...what man cries at a wedding (unless its his and he's realized he's just screwed up his life)?:http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20045213,00.html

Fantasty football, fantasy baseball...Fantasy Congress?:http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-fantasy11jul11,0,3522856.story?coll=la-home-center

Why does George W. Bush hate science?:http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-fantasy11jul11,0,3522856.story?coll=la-home-center

Another Republican sex scandal:http://www.nypost.com/seven/07112007/news/regionalnews/queens_pol_probed_in_sex_rap_regionalnews_murray_weiss_and_maggie_haberman__additional_reporting_frankie_edozien__tatiana_deligiannakis_and_jennifer_fermino.htm

Here we go again....the Bush Administration trying to overcome its 20 percent approval rating by using terror threats:http://www.nydailynews.com/news/wn_report/2007/07/11/2007-07-11_chertoffs_gut_senses_terror_risk.html

The government oughta keep an eye on Paul Stanley..that girl is looking scary!

Tuesday Afternoon Updates:Gene Simmons edition

Which do you think Gene Simmons enjoys more...the sound of his own voice or counting his money?:http://www.spinner.com/2007/07/09/gene-simmons-talks-trash/

Even Gene Simmons has to know our current direction in Iraq isn't working. Yet Dubya continues to advocate staying the course (of course Dubya thought it was a bad idea to put Eric Singer and Tommy Thayer in Peter and Ace's makeup):http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2007/7/10/93137/4020

Gene Simmons doesn't believe in marriage or in getting stoned. Here's a story about a cheating spouse in Iran who got stoned:http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,288793,00.html

Gene Simmons wasn't in Robocop, but some of these devices look like stuff the character he played in Tom Selleck's Runaway would have invested:http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/story?id=3361583&page=1

By the way, Runaway is the best thing on Gene's acting resume.

We all know the God of Thunder (or is he Dr. Love?) hates drugs. Does he condone what the Chinese did to the head of their FDA?:http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/wire/ats-ap_top14jul10,0,1296108.story?coll=la-ap-topnews-headlines

Make sure to catch Gene Simmons Family Jewels on A&E.....I don't know when its on or what time...If you're interested you'll have to look it up yourself.

Tuesday....Groan

Tuesdays suck just as bad as Mondays.....

For the first time, to my knowledge anyway, the blog got some play on another website. Someone enjoyed my comments on Joe Elliot enough to post them on the Melodicrock.com Noticeboard. The whole purpose of this blog was just to find something to do and share some crap with my friends (all 5 of you). I do intend to add some video and other enhancements in the coming weeks (just as soon as I figure out how to do it). I'm hoping one of the first vids to appear will the just completed OMOM directed American Dog video.

The sad, slow death of internet radio is upon us. Sunday is the end of the line for most web radio stations:http://www.dispatch.com/dispatch/content/life/stories/2007/07/10/1_WEB_TUNES.ART_ART_07-10-07_D1_0F779HH.html

The weather for Rocklahoma this weekend looks cool but wet. Lots o'rain in the forecast. Wonder if Vegas is taking bets on the first band to get mud slung at them. That Vince Neil looks ripe for some sod! ***Updated**** The Pryor, OK newspaper has nothing in todays online edition about the big show, not even in the "community" calendar section. Here's a link to some aerial shots of the campground. Considering all the rain that area has had, there's no doubt that sod is gonna be flying:http://www.rockfeverfest.com/grounds.php

Queensryche has announced plans to release a "best of" cd. Does this mean its blank?

Went to see Michael Moore's Sicko over the weekend. For the first time in my life, I wished I lived in France. Free healthcare, Free college, no Dubya. The film is horrifying, yet entertaining as all get out. I've enjoyed all Moore's films but Sicko is by far his best work.

Say this for Pope Benedict....the man is old school....like middle ages. Nothing says warm and fuzzy like a German pope:http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19692094/

An NBA player is a victim of crime....I hope Pacman Jones has an allibi:http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2007/basketball/nba/07/10/bc.bkn.heat.walkerrobbe.ap/index.html?cnn=yes

If you're not watching Flight of the Conchords (shame on you) or too cheap for HBO, Yahoo is streaming the most recent episode:http://tv.yahoo.com/flight-of-the-conchords/show/38719

If you're into New Zealand pop music, and I am, VH1 is streaming the new Crowded House cd. You know the one I couldn't find at Best Buy: http://www.vh1.com/artists/az/crowded_house/1545627/album.jhtml

Vanity Fair is running an oral history of the Simpsons (gotta love that movie hype)...here's an excerpt:http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/features/2007/08/simpsons200708?printable=true&currentPage=all

Speaking of movie hype...Harry Potter hits screens tomorrow and the reviews are in:http://movies2.nytimes.com/2007/07/10/movies/10harr.html?8dpc

For $165 million you can be Charles Foster Kane:http://www.latimes.com/business/la-fi-hearst10jul10,0,5352104.story?coll=la-home-center

Another black eye for TV news:http://www.chicagotribune.com/business/chi-070709jacobsonjul09,1,6178857.story?coll=chi-news-hed

Another horny member of the GOP goes down (heh, heh):http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/07/09/national/main3037338.shtml

More crap as it happens......

Monday Morning Crap Fest

What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard. Congratulations to Def Lep lead singer Joe Elliot who is the winner of my brand spankin' new "You're an Arse" award. This interview with the Pittsburgh Post Gazette earned him the award. In this interview, which I stole from melodicrock.com, Elliot bristles at the notion that Def Lep is a hair band and slags Led Zeppelin in the process:http://forums.melodicrock.com/phorum33/read.php?f=1&i=239604&t=239604

Lighten up Joe. Your hair was just a touch better than Billy Ray Cyrus. Quit being so sensitive. I'm sorry you didn't get the respect you think you deserve. I hope your piles of money give you some satisfaction at night you untalented ass clown.

Things could be worse for Joe. He could be Clay Aiken:http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/08/people.aiken.ap/index.html

Had a lousy Best Buy experience. Wanted CD-R's that were in their Sunday ad...none in stock. Wanted new Crowded House cd..not in stock. Wanted Nintendo Wii...not in stock. At least Sony is trying to compete with the Wii now......they are lowering the price:http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19674547/
they need to lower it another 100 bucks.

The British are coming, the British are coming! To save TV news:http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/tv/la-et-bbc9jul09,0,999381.story?coll=la-home-entertainment

Why do we need debates on pulling out of Iraq? Just get out already:http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/09/washington/09prexy.html?_r=1&hp=&adxnnl=1&oref=slogin&adxnnlx=1183990038-897mUL5z0Lf8c3UphJiJkg

I watched a little bit of Live Earth over the weekend. Crowded House lost lights but not sound during their set, the Japanese really seemd to like Linkin Park and Richie Sambora looks like a fat drunk. USA Today recaps what you missed (not much...Live Earth sucked):http://blogs.usatoday.com/listenup/

In fact, Live Earth sucked so badly I started a tire fire in protest.

I am a golden god! Oh wait...I'm dead...man tries to be Jim Morrison, man dies. :http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2007/07/09/2007-07-09_jim_morrison_wannabe_killed_in_sixstory_.html

People dig the Transformers movie...a lot:http://breakingnews.nypost.com/dynamic/stories/B/BOX_OFFICE?SITE=NYNYP&SECTION=ENTERTAINMENT

The Transformers should enjoy the top while they can....Harry the boy wizard is coming to kick their morphing ass:http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20044270_20044274_20033259,00.html

Rocklahoma is just days away! What kind of town is Pryor, Oklahoma anyway? Is it the lost city of mulletts? Is there a larger hole in the ozone there due to heavy Aquanet consumption? Is it a town where its always 1987? Pryor's population of 12,000 should grow by at least a few hundred this weekend:http://www.pryorok.com/

More crap as it happens.....

Bringin' on the Crap

This may be the best review since the "shit sandwich" review of Spinal Tap's Shark Sandwich...from the Dispatch:

Chalk one up for the proletariat.
Before 20,000 fans in a jam-packed Germain Amphitheater last night, English hard rock band Def Leppard took average to new heights.
Lead singer Joe Elliott is affable enough in a bloke’s sort of way, but his voice is the very definition of mediocre and the years have not been kind to it. He sang off key for much of the band’s hour and a half set and strained to reach high notes on hit singles that most assuredly were reached in the past thanks to the magic of the recording studio.
He’s functional at best.
And certainly there are better guitarists in rock 'n' roll than Phil Collen and Vivian Campbell. Not that there’s anything at all wrong with Collen and Campbell. They’re both fine players. They are simply unexceptional.
And yet, two of Def Leppard’s discs have sold more than 10 million copies in the U.S. and the quintet continues, long after grunge, alternative and rap supplanted straight ahead rock ‘n’ roll as the mainstream music that mattered, to play to appreciative sellout audiences all over the world. (The band’s greatest hits collection has sold 7 million copies worldwide.)
Their secret live is no secret at all: play all (or at least most) of the hits the people want to hear, including Photograph; Hysteria; Mirror, Mirror; Rocket and, of course, Pour Some Sugar on Me.
(Is there anything more disheartening than a pair of 55-year-old suburban women who've been once too many times to the well attempting a little "dirty" dancing under the stars? We think not. Moves that were oh-so sexy back in '81 just wilted in the heat.)
Def Leppard definitely took long enough to get going: Rocket was oddly flat as the opening cut and Animal wasn’t much better. Elliott’s vocals were washed out in the mix and both tracks sounded monolithic.
It wasn’t until the band covered David Essex's Rock On that things began to pick up, and that thanks to founding member Rick Savage’s excellent bass solo introduction. They took that momentum and almost squandered it, moving to the front of the stage for a pair of acoustic songs, Two Steps Behind and Bringin’ On the Heartbreak.
Though both guitarists were consistently nondescript, they were awfully proud of all the hours they have logged in the gym. By the third (or was it the second?) song both Campbell and Collen were stalking the stage shirtless, tights abs glistening.
It was as if they were mocking the bellies of most of their middle-aged male fans, bellies that strained mightily to escape from the confines of whatever shirt (often a Hawaiian print) had been draped over and tucked under them.
Def Leppard’s sum is larger than its parts. But just barely.
Its success is a byproduct of meticulous production (thanks Mutt) and a yeoman-like approach to the rigors of rock ‘n’ roll. In an outdoor season at Germain of only a handful of concerts, that’ll have to be enough.
Illinois bands Styx and REO Speedwagon opened for Def Leppard. A pox on REO lead singer Kevin Cronin for reminding us that the band’s first single, Ridin’ the Storm Out, was released in 1973. As if most of us in attendance didn’t already feel as if we were at our high-school reunion.
Styx sang Come Sail Away or, rather, allowed the audience to sing Come Sail Away. It must be something, even (or especially) for a has-been rock band to have penned a song that 20 times 20,000 fans know by heart 30 years after it first came out.
Likewise, REO let the audience take over the vocals on several of their hits including Keep On Loving You and Take It On the Run.
These bands mattered in their day, maybe more than a little. They don’t matter now, not even a little, unless nostalgia counts for something.
http://www.dispatch.com/dispatch/content/life/stories/2007/07/08/def.html

My Rocklahoma Home

Next weekend every hair band of the 80's (RHINO BUCKET!) will infest Pryor Oklahoma for a 4 day music festival called Rocklahoma. Had something like this taken place in 1987 it would have been a major happening. Now it makes me wonder whether or not the promoter has lost his mind. A show with hair bands...in Oklahoma...in the year 2007? I'm curious as to what kind of guarantee the bands have received. I've not seen anything concrete in regard to advance sales which makes me wonder how sound an investment this was on behalf of the promoter. Message boards have spread rumor that a pay per view broadcast or VH1 Classic special will be shot but I'm doubtful of that being the case. With a handful of exceptions the lineup at Rocklahoma (which can be found here:http://www.rockfeverfest.com/artists.php) with a handful of exceptions (Poison, Queensryche)would have a hard time filling a club with 100 people. Still, I enjoy a good train wreck and this could be a dandy. If nothing else, it beats discussing the Summer of Love.

Big Brother 8 made its debut last night. Here's what ya missed: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13720999/

I haven't been able to find a Nintendo Wii, the PS3 is too expensive and the Xbox 360 sucks. It sucks to the tune of $1 billion in repairs:http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/06/business/06soft.html?_r=1&adxnnl=1&oref=slogin&adxnnlx=1183730462-r/dxqyPN8PIHOpi6F7SjkA

Avril also sucks. And she's a (alleged) thief:http://dispatch.com/dispatch/content/life/stories/2007/07/06/girlfriend.html

rocknrolluniverse.com loves the new American Dog record:http://rocknrolluniverse.com/rocknrolluniverse_472.htm

Meet the new pot:http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/07/05/drug.use/index.html

Its no Rocklahoma...what if you threw a big rock concert for tree huggers and no one gave a rats ass? Meet Live Earth:http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/music/la-et-liveearth6jul06,1,2924232.story?coll=la-headlines-entnews&ctrack=3&cset=true
If you're interested Bravo is showing 18 hours of the concert. Sirius and XM are running the whole thing.

Who wouldn't want to spend $100 on a pair of Homer Simpson Vans?:http://www.usatoday.com/life/movies/news/2007-07-05-movies-clothes_N.htm

First it was Beverly Sills, now its jazz violinist Johnny Frigo (and father of the also deceased Derek Frigo the great guitar player of the vastly unappreciated Enuff Z'Nuff) who has passed away:http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/07/05/AR2007070501899.html


Why does this story amuse me so? Morgan Stanley sex scandal!:http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2007/07/06/2007-07-06_boss_stole_my_undies_exmorgan_aide_says-1.html

Here's another beauty queen scandal:http://www.nypost.com/seven/07062007/news/regionalnews/n_j__miss_in_a_fix_over_her_pics_regionalnews_austin_fenner__with_post_wire_services.htm

Whatever you do this weekend...don't trust a punter!:http://deadspin.com/sports/stabby!/the-nationwide-punter-menace-tredges-on-275172.php

More crap as it happens.....